I've finally admitted to myself that I am no longer able to blog the way I used to, like in the beginning. I feel way too self conscious about what I'm writing and it's paralyzing me from writing at all. And mostly, too many people I know read (or used to read) my blog, and I feel judged and criticized. I'll still be around in all the other social media outlets so I can keep up with all my bloggy friends.
I'm sure I'll resurface somewhere else, somewhere with a fresh perspective and a new-found freedom to express myself. Until then, I'm going to focus my free time on my photography. Stop by there every now and again to see what's happening.
Kyra is the 2nd born, and the last. She is nearly the complete opposite of my oldest. Outgoing, quick-witted, uninhibited, highly emotional, reactive and immature. She has no sense of consequence, having already called 911 for the heck of it, and secretly dipped into all of my makeup (and apparently Nana's!). She's super smart, when she wants to be. She cracks me up, and makes me furious. Kyra definitely keeps us on our toes. So, on her 8th birthday, I gathered a few video clips from my phone and put them together in this little movie.
I have been diligently protecting our wild bunnies. Making sure Chase is not out back alone. Every morning I peek on them to make sure the Mother has returned. I can tell by how the nest covering has been rearranged. The other day, I lifted the cover a bit and spied 3 bunnies! One looked very skinny though. I was afraid it might be the one that seemed injured when Chase mistook it for a toy. But, today I could only see two rather healthy looking bunnies.
Would the mother have taken the other out if it died? Could it have hopped away already?
It took a while to figure out the thing sticking out of one bunny's head was a back leg of another bunny. Initially, I was sure it was deformed. Even E didn't want to look. But once they wiggled around a little, you could tell the limb was attached to the other, thankfully.
I can't wait for them to start making their way out!
Would it be wrong to pick them up and hold them for a minute? I'm dying too!
The other day little K came running into the house screaming, "Mom, Chase got a dead animal and it's squeaking!"
My first thought is obviously, if it's squeaking it's not dead. My second thought? Shit, what kind of mangled, slow-dying mess am I going to have to deal with? I do not deal well with mangled animals.
I head out back to find the dog playing with her catch. When she drops it, little arms and legs are reaching out. I don't want to look. So I half-peer into the grass. It's too big to be a mouse. Too small to be a squirrel. Crap! It's a baby rabbit. Eyes still shut, but furry, so it's about a week old. I run back inside to text my Vet friend, asking her what I should do. Not expecting an immediate response, I quick Googled "my dog got a baby rabbit". Of course, I'm not the first person to Google such a phrase and was directed to my answer.
By the time I went out to deliver the baby bunny back to it's nest per the directions on Rabbit.org, I found it burrowing in thanks to Bunny-Rescuer little K. She declared everything A-OK since she was wearing her gardening gloves.Which is what she was doing right next to the bunny nest, unbeknownst to her, but which also led the dog there.
No sooner did we put the bunny back did Chase rush over to sniff things out. Clearly the dog must be banned from backyard activities until the bunnies move out.
Or so I thought.
The hubs let the dog out at night. Unsupervised.
Mama Rabbit is down one bunny.
I checked the nest in the morning and could tell the Mother had returned. The nest was plumped back up with more fur and grass. There must be more bunnies.
Everyone received strict instructions: Do not let the dog out back alone.
I should have been more clear.
Don't take your eyes off the dog if you're going to be out back with her.
Again, the hubs. Tending to the grill.
Two bunnies found.
Still alive, they were delivered back to their nest.
I checked on them when I heard the news. One doesn't seem to be breathing right. And, the nest was very exposed, all the fur and grass and leaves were askew from the dog. It was going to be freezing that night.
But, I have to let nature take care of things. So I covered them up a bit, knowing the Mother would return in the middle of the night.
I checked on them this morning and she had.
I just hope the one that seems injured recovers, and isn't dying a slow death. But, I've found a rabbit vet nearby so I have a back up plan.
The stereotype about the relationship between a man and his dog is based on reality of course. And I am here to testify that this man LOVES this dog. In fact, there are times when he's nicer to the dog than he is to me!
So I figured it was appropriate that he should have his portrait taken with her. And yes, I will put it in a frame that he can put on his desk. Don't all crazy pet owners have portraits like that on their desks? Or is that just cat owners?
Just kidding!
That is one proud dog!
This one I might consider an outtake. It's kinda hard to look tough with a Golden Retriever. The man just looks angry and the dog looks scared. Probably not one for the frame. I picture this working better with a pit bull, or rottweiler perhaps. And maybe the man slinging a shotgun? hehehehe
On another note, things over at Catt & Co. Photography are moving along slowly. I have to admit, I may be slacking a bit on making it an official business though. I don't want to be one of those "soccer moms with a DSLR" who takes a few good photos, gets a few nice compliments and decides to go into business. I know that's not the case with me, but still. I think I may need to hone my skills a bit more and differentiate my style because there are photographers all over the place these days. It's a little crazy.
You know that feeling when you're supposed to be serious, but you start laughing? Then, you're laughing because you're laughing until you're crying-laughing and you just can't stop? I used to do that in church when I sat with my friends. I'd laugh so hard my cheeks would hurt. That's what happened here with my girls...
Well, I'll get to THAT in a moment, and believe me, it's worth the wait.
First, I must explain what happened after I left the bloggers and dinner.
My husband insisted I get gas in NJ because it's cheaper. It was easier to stop on my way home, rather than on my way in. I weighed the consequence of doing this in...Camden. Busy road. I will survive.
But.
No sooner did I roll my window down and tell the attendant what I needed, then a stranger appeared.
An older, white man, who appeared to be sober and clean.
Yes. That is all relevant for Camden.
He introduced himself. I have no recollection of what his name was.Hmmm, did he even tell me? He told me where he was from. Somewhere north or west of Reading, PA.Shoemakersville? Something weird like that.
He then declared that he was not coming any closer - he was about 4 feet from my open window, then proceeded to tell me his predicament. I heard sparse details. Something about his passenger side of his car getting smashed in, he is a site manager on a building project, his briefcase and other things I can't remember are gone. I don't know if that means they got stolen or what but he showed me his driver's license to prove where he was from. A driver's license he pulled from his wallet. Wallet?
Meanwhile, all I can think about is, what does he want? A ride? No chance. Is he telling the truth? Is he sober? Is he for real?? What the fuck.
He then went on to tell me that his wife was coming from their home to pick him up...and something about being at the foot of the Ben Franklin Bridge. I just don't know.
Okay, okay. What do you need?
And here is where I act like a human being. I want to help him. He seems completely sincere. In my mind, I am offering him a ride as far as I'm going to help cut the distance for his wife. But, that's not the world we live in. I'm a woman, driving alone after 11 pm, talking to a strange man at a gas station in Camden, NJ. Of course, if I offer him a ride, he will kill me. That's how it works in the movies, right?
He said all the right things about if I help him it will restore his faith in humanity (heard that before). I'm the friendliest looking person he's seen all night. (Um, yeah. We're in Camden!) He made a point to stay far enough out of my personal space...
In the back of my mind, I hear something I read recently about how we/people look for reasons NOT to help others. This is true. I see homeless people every day. I could help them. But I don't because I rationalize that if I give them money they will spend it on alcohol or drugs and not use it to help themselves or get food.
So here I am faced with this person who is blathering on about his horrible predicament. And I'm relieved that he's not asking for a ride. Because of course he will kill me. I'm happy to give him money. So I did. He wanted my business card to repay me or something, sing my praises to the other career con artists. I just gave him my email address. I don't want to be repaid, but I said I'd like to know how he fares. I'm still feeling human at this point.
He thanked me and walked off, on his cell phone.
And that's when I started to analyze the conversation and second guess the entire encounter.
What exactly did he need money for? His wife was on her way. He had a wallet. Did he say his credit cards were stolen? Where are the police? I'm so naive. I want to believe the good in people, except now I'm pretty sure I just got conned. I mean, did I? I'm just not sure.
And this is why it's so hard to help people? You can't trust anybody.
PS. What happens to bloggers when they go out to dinner? You'll have to watch this:
Before our kids are too old to appreciate it, we have booked a quick trip to Disney at the end of this month, hoping to avoid the Spring Break crush. That means, of course, we have to take the girls out of school for a couple days. Which, for a kid, is far better than a vacation over a break. They get to have fun while everyone else is in school. Suckas!
This also means, getting an Excused Absense approved. Far be it from me to tarnish the girls' records with an unexcused absence. I can just imagine the wrath I would face if that came back to bite them in the ass when they try to graduate. 'Cause that would be my luck.
So now I'm left with finding the educational value in Disney.
I'm thinking imagination, creativity, travel, first time experiences... not so sure this is going to fly.
Off to the trusty internets for some soul searching. I didn't expect to find much but I was surprisingly wrong.
Lots of parents had been looking for "educational value" in Disney. And there's lots! I was just too lazy to put some thought into it. But why recreate the wheel?
* Nature & conservation at Animal Kingdom.
* Economics by managing spending money.
* Science by exploring the Mission:Space ride in Epcot where kids can see and feel what it would be like to travel by rocket to Mars.
* Different cultures of the world, including architecture, language, diet and dress, by visiting the different countries in the Epcot World Showcase. Exploring the exhibits for each country & speaking with natives from each country who work as cast members.
* American history at Hall of Presidents in Magic Kingdom & the American Adventure show in Epcot.
*Map reading by navigating in & to the different Theme Parks, Resorts & water parks via Disney's bus system, sociological aspects of crowds including patterns & behavior, physics of the different rides, breakthroughs in technology, art, animation & the history of film.
How great is that?! And the list goes on! I promptly filled out my form, and crossed my fingers the principal doesn't think it's a load of bullshit! I mean, really, isn't just living life educational? I still learn something new everyday.
My youngest daughter makes me insane. Her emotional outbursts bring out the worst in me. And my emotional outbursts don't scare her into listening. Which really makes for an entertaining scene.
Of course, I want what every parent wants. I want my children to act like little adults and behave appropriately. How dare they act like, like...children!
This morning was especially challenging - a school day with fresh snow on the ground. I told her it was time to get dressed and she flat out said, No. I'm sure you're familiar with how this scene played out.
I'm sure I'm also doing everything the parenting books tell you NOT to do. Like threatening to pack your own bag and move across country because you can't deal with children who don't listen anymore.
Yeah. I said that.
My own version of a tantrum.
Anyone have some Valium they can spare? I seriously need to just mellow out.
And the best part is that she's supposed to be "earning back" a playdate she was supposed to have this weekend, which I took away because of horrible behavior at dinner last night.
What the hell do I have to do to get her to listen? I'm seriously considering applying to the Super Nanny.
I have been more than a little distracted lately with the possibility of taking photography fulltime. Far off down the road but still, there's that glimmer...
Every weekend I've had a least one portfolio-building photo session. I can happily say, I'm done and now taking "photos for commission". I'm working on my site, my marketing material and even keeping my eye on some photo retreats/workshops to attend later in the year. Estate sales will take on a new meaning as I scout for vintage props too! I am having so much fun. As I continue to define my style, you can see things evolve here. And be sure to like my Facebook page!
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